Ode to the Bot

The past 3 months since my last biopsy have flown by with trips to Texas, Indiana, and family visiting us, as well. As of today, all that lies ahead that is planned for the rest of this year is one more trip to Seattle for what should be the last bone marrow biopsy of 2016. As I sit here today, having sort of a mental health-type day, it's difficult not to reflect on the past year, and how difficult it has been for so many people I know. Yet, through the rough times, I am thankful to have had this experience because I feel that it has allowed me to become more present in my everyday life and listen in ways that I otherwise would not have been capable of previously doing. 

I wanted to write this post a couple of days ago, but I was overwhelmed with planning Remi's 2nd birthday party. When we're kids, a birthday is a celebration of another revolution around the sun- one year older, one more year closer to freedom, another year closer to being "big". 

As a mother, I believe that birthdays take on another meaning. Of course, it's your baby's birthday, but it is also the birth of you as a wholly new person. Your life is forever changed and you have the power to help shape this tiny person who, quite possibly, might have a greater impact on the world than any of us presently realize. One of many things that I find interesting about motherhood is the fact that as a child, we see parents and adults as always being the ones who are teaching us. However, at least from my perspective, it's the tiny ones who teach us the most. 

In the first two years, time in the present seems to stand still a fair amount of the time. Yet, as the months pass by, all of the new things they're capable of doing and now saying is mind blowing, and we begin to wish that time would slow down. 

Our Rembot no longer looks like a baby and is most definitely a little girl now who loves "herses and corns", dancing, climbing (and saying "watch, dis!" while doing so), playing outside, fishing with Daddy, her bros Pierre and Bapper, and kitties. She loves animals- asking nearly every night to look at pictures and videos of deer, puppies, kitties, and moose. While every child has their "moments" (and let's face it, as adults, we have moments too), she is one of the sweetest and funniest girls I've ever known. I can only hope that she carries these traits with her throughout her life as she grows older. One of the greatest parts about being her mom, is seeing how new and exciting all of her experiences are through her eyes. Things that we take for granted as adults are once again put into new perspective and it's so good to see that again. 

When I first found out I was pregnant, I really felt like the baby I was carrying was a girl, but I kept telling myself that it would be a boy, mostly for the reason that I felt (and still feel) that the life of a boy/man is much easier than that of girls and women. However, as time went on, I felt a sense of empowerment and opportunity to help raise a little girl into a strong, badass, sweet, loyal, sassy, authentic, intelligent, etc. woman, and I can only hope that as the years go on, I have the opportunity to be there for Remi in as many ways as she needs and/or wants me to be. 

So, in ending this sappy piece...
Remi, if blogs still exist when you're old enough to read this one, especially in times where we might not like each other so much, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for helping to make me who I am currently and who I am still becoming. Thank you for showing me your world and allowing me to be part of it, for letting me know always where we stand- toddler honesty is impressive, to say the least. Thank you for the snuggles and love. Thank you for your sweet dance moves that can turn any bad day into a good one. And your belly laughs...the best sound in the world. Thank you for being you and the adventure that is to come. Thank you for letting me be your mom. Happy Big 2!